Now i know how "Gravity Sucks !!! "
“I told you I'd leave a light on ….” is the beginning of a beautiful cowboy song currently set to be my alarm. And it was the first thing I heard on 19th July, 2010 at 7:00 AM (PST). The day when I had planned to go SkyDiving, without even thinking of how scary that can be. As the song, as slow as its rhythm , slowly tried to get into my sleeping mind and get me started for a new day, I was quick to snooze the alarm. “Snooze” a boon for you when you are in bed and a ban, when you are out of it. After a few minutes the song started again and this was the time I really had to get up and get started. I opened my eyes and just tried to get a flash back of how things were last night, before I went to bed. All I could remember was “Flaming Dr. Peppers” (thanks Nayak for introducing me to yet another thing, which when you start loving, will start killing you). But this one doesnt give a hangover though. (now u know what it is :) ). Up from my sleep, out from the bed and here I am ready for yet another adventure.
I was ready within a few minutes and was waiting for the rest of the gang to come and pick me. Luckily I didn’t forget to carry my ID. This ‘carrying ID’ part sucks big time here in US, you need it even to buy a beer, common guys …. This is not done. Am fed-up of the Federal Law on this part. Come to Goa and see how it works there, its so nice, u guys need to do it like us here as well, god will bless you. Anyways I was waiting for Bharat’s call to get the latest udates on the plan. (Bharat was the event co-ordinator :) ). The plan has been changing frequently for a while now and I wouldnt be surprised to hear more changes. But luckily things had remained same. Bharat and Amit came to The Presidio and we all left together to Byron, CA.
Next was the 40 mile drive through those brown hills which were lush green when I first saw them 3 months back and those numerous wind mills above the hills asking you to click their pictures. It was the drive through the village (yes, there are villages in the US) which finally reached us to our destination. (I still didn’t give a thought to how scary this can be, but I knew I would do it). It had a deserted look, a big room and few people who were ready to fly up and then jump down. Lots of hills around, big wind mills, too many electricity polls and wires. I just hoped while coming down I don’t get in between the blades of those wind mills or entangled in to electricity wires. But I did see some people diving down pretty safely, then the trainers collect the parachute and get it to their girlfriends who then fold the parachutes for the next dive. NOW, this fact that his girl friend folds the parachute for him didn’t go well with me. I mean, how can you trust somebody else to fold your parachute. And then I have to trust a guy who inturn trusts his girl friend to fold his parachute. It is crazy. What if the parachute doest open when you are up in the sky?? All that you can do is just fire bad-words, but is that sufficient enough?? Would you like to die by just firing bad words to the one who is killing you and whom you can see down clicking your pictures while you approach death?? This is when things started getting a bit serious. And I now knew what I am going to do.
We then approached the reception where we had to fill up a form which needed us to sign at just too many places. (More signs than those needed for mutual funds) I really don’t know what all was written in there but I didn’t miss to sign even a single blank. After reading some books (skydiving and physics, wfooof, I avoided this) and watching some videos we were finally introduced to out trainers, who would be diving along with us.
This man’s name was Thorsten, and he has done 11,114 jumps till date. I was happy as I wont be doing this with a fresher. He told me that he has 3 kids and his confident we will make it and go home safely in the evening. He was a funny man, very jovial and highly experienced when it comes to sky diving. He saw me wearing a watch and asked me to get my hand behind my head if incase the parachute entangles or something happens and we come crashing on the ground, when I asked why he said “That will keep your watch safe”. He kept on cracking jokes just to make me feel easy. He didn’t know that I’m still cool about this skydiving thing except for the parachute folding part (which kept on coming to my mind). He did tell me about some How to’s, what to’s and what not to’s about skydiving. He then said Suit-Up, we are flying in a few minutes. He then helped me wear the harness and asked me to make sure that my ba$$s are in the right place so that I don’t cry, when the parachute opens up in the sky. He did use that language and delivered it in a funny rhyming way, but I knew how important it was as far as the men-business is concerned. (imagine if….)
Then comes the plane and we walk towards it, full suited up and all set for the flight (music: taranh taranh taranh) and then we enter the plane (more music: taranh taranh taranh). This reminded me of those days when I used to be before the television watching the pilots enter the plane with that pride, honor, attitude and what not. Although I knew I won’t be flying the plane but still, walking towards it with the suit on, is a great feeling. We were in teams of three. Our team had: Thorsten the trainer, Yuri the cameraman and me. We were sitting in the plane in the opposite direction of the flight. That reminded me of Russel Peters “save our troops” episode. (watch it if you have still not). Then we start flying, Yuri keeps on taking pictures, making faces, cracking jokes trying to keep me at easy. He doesn’t know I’m still at ease, yeah except for the parachute folding part. Thorsten tells me that now he is the most important person in my life and that I should follow, respect, and agree to whatever he says and do whatever he wants. And I am like, “what the efff ? You didn’t tell me that before coming here…” . And then he asks me, will you marry me (ahhhhhhhhhh) and I say yes (had to, no other option) He was kidding though and we never got married. (Sometimes, I have to clarify every bit of what I write). I then look out of the window, we are 9000 feet above ground and I feel like I’m looking at the screen on my laptop and opened before me is a Google maps window. It was beautiful. Yuri still clicks pictures, Thorsten gives some tips but I am in no mood of listening, all that’s going on in my mind is “What am I doing here? and who are these fools? Save me God”. Then I say to myself “OK easy, I can do it, yes I will (deep breath)”. Thorsten checks my harness for one more time, tells me that all hooks are fine, tells me to be easy, asks me to wear the glasses, asks me if I am ready, I say yes and then he goes again “Will you marry me?” Ahhh… this is sick but I had to say yes. He is still kidding ok and we never got married. Yuri then opens the door. (Now start reading fast) Bharat is the first one to jump, I can see the look on his face , I know what is going through his mind, but he smiles at me, we both pretend we are all good, but I know the truth, faat chuki hai dono ki, hawa teji se andhar aah rahi hai, hum kya karne ja rahe hai baap?, bharat walks towards the door, and they jump (stop reading fast) Mannn he did it…. Next is my turn. (Go, grab your popcorn and drink before you proceed)
The door is still open, its my turn next. We walk towards the door, I look down , Thorsten shouts “I Told you not to look down, look up”. I am shit scared now, I ask Thorsten again. “man you sure you have the parachute”. He says “Yes Sir!” Yuri Jumps first, I’m on the edge of the door, I look down for a second, ahhhhhhhh, Thorsten pulls my head onto his shoulder to make me look up, I am dying guys, a push from Thorsten and we are off the plane.
Silenceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee………………………………..
Off from the plane, 13000 feet above the ground, Jesus Christ what have I done? Those 2-5 seconds I was breathless, almost dead, the free fall has begun and then suddenly after those 5 numb seconds I am all excited, the fear is gone and I am shouting like crazy. Gravity sucks me down, I shout loud but my voice hits me back on my face, I’m in no mood of smiling but the wind forces me to stretch my face and look like I’m smiling, Gravity still sucks and I’m coming down at a high speed, the ground is far below me, Yuri is closeby busy clicking pictures, I’m enjoying this now, shouting like anything, Thorsten calls me crazy but I don’t care. Its f*&^ing amazing and I cant believe I’m in the air. The wind is kinda pushing me upwards but gravity sucks bad, and I’m loving it. The free fall didn’t last long until Thorsten said his opening the parachute. The parachute opened and it felt like the sky just pulled me back towards it (whoooppsieee), against the laws of gravity, but soon again gravity took over and began to suck. (And in all this I forgot to realize one thing. The parachute opened successfully. Oh man it opened, Thorsten’s girl friend did a great job ;) .) And then with the parachute it was beautiful, slowly swaying with the wind, left to right, turning around, its really amazing. Then suddenly I realized that my shoe laces are open, now who the hell did that? I don’t want to lose my shoes now. If either one of the falls, I know I’ll never get it back. But I was more interested in the parachute ride giving me some control over the gravity. Thorsten did well to sway me around, it was amazing. His experienced helped me a lot. He even gave me control over the parachute and tried to teach me some stuff. I couldn’t pick it up though. I was more interested in looking at how the hills, houses, roads keep getting bigger and bigger as I approach towards the ground. Then he said we will be landing in 30 seconds, remember to stretch your legs forward as we approach the ground. The idea was to land on his butt (ha ha ha, landing on somebody else’s but, ha ha ha). And soon we were on the ground. My ears were blocked and I was like deaf for some seconds. It was a beautifully controlled landing and the end of an amazing and memorable dive. I was so happy on making it. Its fantabulastic. Nobody should miss an opportunity on this one.
Haaaah! I made it. Walking with a big smile on my face, full of pride and a sense of achievement, among everybody whose asking how was it, and bla bla bla I went inside and I fell on the couch, couldn’t make out if I was hungry or sleepy. My head was still going round and round. Man, this was a hell of an experience. Collected my pics and the video, met Thorsten and thanked him for the wonderful experience, a hi-hello-bye to everybody and we drove home. After reaching home had good food, set the alarm and went to sleep. On my bed with my eyes closed, as I was recollecting the beautiful experience didn’t even know when I fell asleep, until it was 6:00 PM and I heard the song “I told you I'd leave a light on ….”
I was ready within a few minutes and was waiting for the rest of the gang to come and pick me. Luckily I didn’t forget to carry my ID. This ‘carrying ID’ part sucks big time here in US, you need it even to buy a beer, common guys …. This is not done. Am fed-up of the Federal Law on this part. Come to Goa and see how it works there, its so nice, u guys need to do it like us here as well, god will bless you. Anyways I was waiting for Bharat’s call to get the latest udates on the plan. (Bharat was the event co-ordinator :) ). The plan has been changing frequently for a while now and I wouldnt be surprised to hear more changes. But luckily things had remained same. Bharat and Amit came to The Presidio and we all left together to Byron, CA.
Next was the 40 mile drive through those brown hills which were lush green when I first saw them 3 months back and those numerous wind mills above the hills asking you to click their pictures. It was the drive through the village (yes, there are villages in the US) which finally reached us to our destination. (I still didn’t give a thought to how scary this can be, but I knew I would do it). It had a deserted look, a big room and few people who were ready to fly up and then jump down. Lots of hills around, big wind mills, too many electricity polls and wires. I just hoped while coming down I don’t get in between the blades of those wind mills or entangled in to electricity wires. But I did see some people diving down pretty safely, then the trainers collect the parachute and get it to their girlfriends who then fold the parachutes for the next dive. NOW, this fact that his girl friend folds the parachute for him didn’t go well with me. I mean, how can you trust somebody else to fold your parachute. And then I have to trust a guy who inturn trusts his girl friend to fold his parachute. It is crazy. What if the parachute doest open when you are up in the sky?? All that you can do is just fire bad-words, but is that sufficient enough?? Would you like to die by just firing bad words to the one who is killing you and whom you can see down clicking your pictures while you approach death?? This is when things started getting a bit serious. And I now knew what I am going to do.
We then approached the reception where we had to fill up a form which needed us to sign at just too many places. (More signs than those needed for mutual funds) I really don’t know what all was written in there but I didn’t miss to sign even a single blank. After reading some books (skydiving and physics, wfooof, I avoided this) and watching some videos we were finally introduced to out trainers, who would be diving along with us.
This man’s name was Thorsten, and he has done 11,114 jumps till date. I was happy as I wont be doing this with a fresher. He told me that he has 3 kids and his confident we will make it and go home safely in the evening. He was a funny man, very jovial and highly experienced when it comes to sky diving. He saw me wearing a watch and asked me to get my hand behind my head if incase the parachute entangles or something happens and we come crashing on the ground, when I asked why he said “That will keep your watch safe”. He kept on cracking jokes just to make me feel easy. He didn’t know that I’m still cool about this skydiving thing except for the parachute folding part (which kept on coming to my mind). He did tell me about some How to’s, what to’s and what not to’s about skydiving. He then said Suit-Up, we are flying in a few minutes. He then helped me wear the harness and asked me to make sure that my ba$$s are in the right place so that I don’t cry, when the parachute opens up in the sky. He did use that language and delivered it in a funny rhyming way, but I knew how important it was as far as the men-business is concerned. (imagine if….)
Then comes the plane and we walk towards it, full suited up and all set for the flight (music: taranh taranh taranh) and then we enter the plane (more music: taranh taranh taranh). This reminded me of those days when I used to be before the television watching the pilots enter the plane with that pride, honor, attitude and what not. Although I knew I won’t be flying the plane but still, walking towards it with the suit on, is a great feeling. We were in teams of three. Our team had: Thorsten the trainer, Yuri the cameraman and me. We were sitting in the plane in the opposite direction of the flight. That reminded me of Russel Peters “save our troops” episode. (watch it if you have still not). Then we start flying, Yuri keeps on taking pictures, making faces, cracking jokes trying to keep me at easy. He doesn’t know I’m still at ease, yeah except for the parachute folding part. Thorsten tells me that now he is the most important person in my life and that I should follow, respect, and agree to whatever he says and do whatever he wants. And I am like, “what the efff ? You didn’t tell me that before coming here…” . And then he asks me, will you marry me (ahhhhhhhhhh) and I say yes (had to, no other option) He was kidding though and we never got married. (Sometimes, I have to clarify every bit of what I write). I then look out of the window, we are 9000 feet above ground and I feel like I’m looking at the screen on my laptop and opened before me is a Google maps window. It was beautiful. Yuri still clicks pictures, Thorsten gives some tips but I am in no mood of listening, all that’s going on in my mind is “What am I doing here? and who are these fools? Save me God”. Then I say to myself “OK easy, I can do it, yes I will (deep breath)”. Thorsten checks my harness for one more time, tells me that all hooks are fine, tells me to be easy, asks me to wear the glasses, asks me if I am ready, I say yes and then he goes again “Will you marry me?” Ahhh… this is sick but I had to say yes. He is still kidding ok and we never got married. Yuri then opens the door. (Now start reading fast) Bharat is the first one to jump, I can see the look on his face , I know what is going through his mind, but he smiles at me, we both pretend we are all good, but I know the truth, faat chuki hai dono ki, hawa teji se andhar aah rahi hai, hum kya karne ja rahe hai baap?, bharat walks towards the door, and they jump (stop reading fast) Mannn he did it…. Next is my turn. (Go, grab your popcorn and drink before you proceed)
The door is still open, its my turn next. We walk towards the door, I look down , Thorsten shouts “I Told you not to look down, look up”. I am shit scared now, I ask Thorsten again. “man you sure you have the parachute”. He says “Yes Sir!” Yuri Jumps first, I’m on the edge of the door, I look down for a second, ahhhhhhhh, Thorsten pulls my head onto his shoulder to make me look up, I am dying guys, a push from Thorsten and we are off the plane.
Silenceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee………………………………..
Off from the plane, 13000 feet above the ground, Jesus Christ what have I done? Those 2-5 seconds I was breathless, almost dead, the free fall has begun and then suddenly after those 5 numb seconds I am all excited, the fear is gone and I am shouting like crazy. Gravity sucks me down, I shout loud but my voice hits me back on my face, I’m in no mood of smiling but the wind forces me to stretch my face and look like I’m smiling, Gravity still sucks and I’m coming down at a high speed, the ground is far below me, Yuri is closeby busy clicking pictures, I’m enjoying this now, shouting like anything, Thorsten calls me crazy but I don’t care. Its f*&^ing amazing and I cant believe I’m in the air. The wind is kinda pushing me upwards but gravity sucks bad, and I’m loving it. The free fall didn’t last long until Thorsten said his opening the parachute. The parachute opened and it felt like the sky just pulled me back towards it (whoooppsieee), against the laws of gravity, but soon again gravity took over and began to suck. (And in all this I forgot to realize one thing. The parachute opened successfully. Oh man it opened, Thorsten’s girl friend did a great job ;) .) And then with the parachute it was beautiful, slowly swaying with the wind, left to right, turning around, its really amazing. Then suddenly I realized that my shoe laces are open, now who the hell did that? I don’t want to lose my shoes now. If either one of the falls, I know I’ll never get it back. But I was more interested in the parachute ride giving me some control over the gravity. Thorsten did well to sway me around, it was amazing. His experienced helped me a lot. He even gave me control over the parachute and tried to teach me some stuff. I couldn’t pick it up though. I was more interested in looking at how the hills, houses, roads keep getting bigger and bigger as I approach towards the ground. Then he said we will be landing in 30 seconds, remember to stretch your legs forward as we approach the ground. The idea was to land on his butt (ha ha ha, landing on somebody else’s but, ha ha ha). And soon we were on the ground. My ears were blocked and I was like deaf for some seconds. It was a beautifully controlled landing and the end of an amazing and memorable dive. I was so happy on making it. Its fantabulastic. Nobody should miss an opportunity on this one.
Haaaah! I made it. Walking with a big smile on my face, full of pride and a sense of achievement, among everybody whose asking how was it, and bla bla bla I went inside and I fell on the couch, couldn’t make out if I was hungry or sleepy. My head was still going round and round. Man, this was a hell of an experience. Collected my pics and the video, met Thorsten and thanked him for the wonderful experience, a hi-hello-bye to everybody and we drove home. After reaching home had good food, set the alarm and went to sleep. On my bed with my eyes closed, as I was recollecting the beautiful experience didn’t even know when I fell asleep, until it was 6:00 PM and I heard the song “I told you I'd leave a light on ….”
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Video:
posted by Pelé @ 9:09 PM
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